John Mayer and Katy Perry are dating, and I'm going to buy a crochet hook and some yarn. I'm not jealous, just somewhat grumpy and needing something to do.
I don't like the thought of separating people who are happy together or who could be happy together if they tried. Almost 5 years after the first offer I got to date a famous person, I have even more concerns than I had the first year. No famous person has ever really asked me for a date, though; most of those people seem to think that "Hey! Vagina girl!" should be introduction and inducement enough. I also AM NEVER GOING TO DATE SOMEONE WHO PROMOTES THE CONGLOMERATE'S AGENDA.
I guess it's me, the couch, the television and my attempts to remember how to crochet, for a while. I'm sure that life does not mean to be mean to me, no matter how many people do.
I do not want to date anyone at this time; I think I should mention that, since I sound and am wistful about my lack of a love life rather than jealous of other people's love lives. I am in transition; when I'm settled in a number of ways, I'll think about dating. Hopefully, I won't have crocheted a blanket by then.
Copyright L. Kochman, January 12, 2015 @ 7:08 p.m.
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